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Am I a superhero? Or just a lunatic that wears a cape...and rants?

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Nothing Cries Rain Down On Me Like A Pair Of Boobs

A story I read today brought to my attention one of the most ingenious... absurd...no, ingenious ways for creepy ingenious old men to get the young women of their neighborhood to strip off all of their clothes and do the town's hard labor...OOOPS! I mean.....well, ok maybe not that hard, but pretty difficult

Oh, the W's you must be asking yourself.

Well, according to the article, farmers from Patna, India have been keeping this magic a secret for quite some time. Ok, I'll get on with it. Apparently there is a custom there where young women get naked, sing hymns, and plow their fields (hehe) in order to embarrass the Weather Gods and cause them to discharge release money-shots monsoon rains down onto their boobs cropped fields making them moist wet(still sounds dirty).

As strange as this ritual might sound, the people of Patna believe it will bring the much needed rain to their region as they have suffered terrible droughts this year. The drought indeed sucks, but faith that a booby-fearing, super-soaker God is going to literally rain down and save the crops is probably not the most sound belief system out there. I mean, where is this God? Where's all the rain he's supposed to be supplying? Isn't his absence slightly odd? Really, if he's not going to turn on the sprinklers, the least he can do is make an unannounced cameo in someone's breakfast to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is indeed real, and just simply wants suffering to continue?

Personally, I don't really put my faith in a bunch of different Gods, per se, but I do often carry out the commands that my Alphabits cereal spells out to me in the morning.

I hope the weather in Patna shifts and the people there get their much needed rain...You know what? Sitting back hoping isn't going to get the Weather God's butt in gear. Therefore, I propose that this weekend people everywhere strip down to all their sloppy-floppy glory and tend to their gardens during what I'm calling 'Global Naked Yardwork to Embarrass the Weather God's Day'. Let's help these farmers out!!


  1. booby-fearing, super-soaker God - This line made me laugh out loud. Since I'm at work and there is no fun allowed at work I had to try and turn it into a cough. =)

  2. just want to make sure, but Global Naked Yardwork to Embarass the Weather God's Day is this weekend, right? I didn't wanna be the only one...

  3. if this were true it would rain like crazy every spring break

  4. @Natalie- Hah! I'm glad I could help you break the opressing rules of your job :)

    @Mr. O- Lets make it this weekend and everyone after until it rains in Patna

    @Valerie- I think the Weather Gods and the guy who makes the GGW videos have an under the table deal to ensure that doesn't happen

  5. I think boobs have the power to cure all the worlds ailments. This is also entirely dependent on how nice the rack is.

  6. @Lola- They do have a certain power...but over the Gods? Yea...maybe they do.

  7. Tirader, you've done it again. Isn't there also something about naked chicks curing AIDS or something?

  8. @Tennyson- I think I heard that too...Lola seems to think that boobs cure all ailments. She might have something there

  9. Why on earth aren't we doing something as awesome as this in Australia? Vast swathes of our arid continent are dry as a bone, so to speak. I think you've given me an excellent reason to do yard work in the buff, Caped. And tell Mr O that it can be on any weekend he chooses... so long as there's webcam! HAHAHAHA!


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