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Am I a superhero? Or just a lunatic that wears a cape...and rants?

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

So I read a news story last week that freaked me out a little, but I'm just getting around to talking about now. Apparently there is a 16-year-old girl (Brooke Greenberg) in the Chicago area that doesn’t age. I don’t mean that she’s a midget. I mean she is 16, but has the mind and body of a toddler. To top that off, doctors don’t have clue as to why or how this is possible.

The girl weighs 16-pounds, is 2’6” tall and, though “she can express frustration and happiness”, she can’t speak. I wonder if she really has the consciousness of a 16-year-old and just the expression ability of a toddler. Her mother seems to believe that Brooke shows some signs of there being a normal teenage girl inside her stating that Brooke enjoys shopping.

Maybe she is being taught a life lesson like Bill Murray. Everyday she wakes up in her toddler body and reenacts the same events looking for meaning in them.


Maybe she isn’t a 16-year-old baby at all, but really a sophisticated video camera sent to Earth by diabolical space creatures to learn our ways and plan an eventual global takeover, and enslave our entire species…I’ve seen it a hundred times. Before long they will be placing subliminal messages in advertisements and we will all start walking around this planet like mindless drones. Wait, that’s already begun!! OMG! These creatures must be stopped!

Ok, enough of that.

Of course doctors are now going gaga over the thought that they might be able to use this poor girl to figure out why we age; and they are making ‘fountain of youth’ references, which means that she will soon become nothing more than a lab experiment.

They are actually going to run a show about her on TLC called: Child Frozen in Time, which will air on August 2nd at 10pm.

I think this is definitely worth a watch, though I don’t know what these doctors will actually discover about cell death that they don’t already know. Then again, it would be sweet if they did figure out how to slow down the aging process and people could be kids for longer. Then again…again, as evidenced by my Scooby Doo underwears…my cape - Ok, Scooby Doo underwears AND cape, I don’t really need scientific breakthroughs to act like a kid.


  1. that is pretty weird. and the media gets to exploit a child and not be totally reprimanded about it. yeah modern society. Let go bitch about the rights of people who aren't born yet instead.

  2. Caped, I saw this story too and actually wondered if you'd be posting about it! So glad you did - funny and awesome, as usual.

    I'm kinda scared by the idea that this poor girl will now become some kind of glorified lab rat for two reasons:

    1. Her chronological age may be 16, but she's basically just a toddler. Exploitation of anyone - especially young children - is NOT OK.

    2. Why do we actually need a 'fountain of youth'? Can't we all just age normally like normal people and stop pretending that we'll look 20 for the rest of our lives?


    OK, rant over. Great post!

  3. yeah I dont like this idea they have at all, I agree totally with teacup.

  4. very interesting. Can't say i WANT to watch this, but i'm pretty sure I will end up doing just that

  5. Interesting! I'm not sure if the show will be aired in India :| I would definitely would like to know what the docs would discover.

  6. @Valerie- Yea, the exploitation here is pretty obvious. As for the other issue, I think people on both sides of that debate are way too polarized.

    @Teacup- Thanx. as alwyas overly flattering :) I saw this and then got too busy to sit down and read it until the other day. Yes, as if this girl doesn't have it tough enough. I'm interested to hear what her parents have to say.

    @Mr. C.- That's often a good side to land on :)

    @Mr. O.- It's just one of those stories that will draw in a lot of people I think

    @Esther- I'm sure you'll be able to find it after it airs on the net :)

  7. This is like a car wreck and you just can't look away no matter how frightening it is and pretty soon you have , like, a mile of traffic backed up behind you.

    I know I'm going to garner ill karma for my next comment but I'm going to go ahead and be the shallow, souless creature that I am and say, if I have to look like she does for the rest of my life- trapped in that little body- eff the fountain of youth man. Just eff it.

    Nice post CT!

  8. @Lola- I'm right there with you! Trapped in the body of a baby? no thanx

  9. Wow, I hadn't heard about this! Bizarre! I'll probably check out that show about her!

  10. @Lila- It promises to be interesting


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