About Me

My photo
Am I a superhero? Or just a lunatic that wears a cape...and rants?

Monday, June 8, 2009

Let's Talk About Our Feelings

First, I want to say sorry for slacking off last week. -Insert excuse here-.

Ok, now that I've taken care of that, I want to discuss something I read about this weekend that is so conceptually ridiculous and utterly idiotic that it makes me want to find its creators and smack them ask them to express how they feel and work with them towards finding a common ground through our differences of opinion.

What I read about is something called Consensual-Living. According to the creators of this group, consensual-living is "a process, a philosophy, a mindset by which we seek to live in harmony with our families and community." Sounds nice, right? Doesn't everyone want to live in harmony with their families’ and communities?

BUT what this really is is some quacky, hippy-ish, LaLa Land living nutjob's way of blurring the lines between the imperative authority role of a parent and the imperative subordinate role of a child. I am so sick of brainless parents trying to make everything equal and harmonious at the risk of common sense.

We live in a society where kids can fail all of their classes and still move on to the next grade because some parents fear that the embarrassment of being left back is worse than the risk of allowing a fucking moron to move along with his/her peers. RED INK sends kids the message that they got something wrong on a test so we shouldn't use it. Competition is unhealthy and elitist so lets give everyone a First Place trophy no matter how talented or untalented they are. All of these crackpot beliefs are destroying childrens' motivation and eliminating incentive to excel and will create a society of equally mediocre individuals if they aren't kept in check. Consensual-Living is no different.

The way it "works" is everyone in the household has an equal say with regard to the decision making in the house. I don't just mean both parents (as it should be). I mean parents and kids alike. So, take something as simple as setting a bedtime. Under this method, the parent needs to be considerate of how the child feels with regard to the bedtime set and must seriously and considerately entertain any potential objections by their child to this bedtime. WTF!? My guess is that the creators of this method of parenting were raised in strict households and are trying to get back at their parents by not actually parenting.

Look, I'm not saying that a parent shouldn't be considerate of their child's feelings, but this is kind of overboard.

The site continues by stating that punishments and rewards are just "tools of manipulation" and that it is important to let your child "explore their feelings" because they "know their body and their mind." So next time you are at the grocery store and your kid is acting like a complete maniac, crying and throwing a tantrum because you wouldn't buy them some crappy toy, you should calmly and respectfully allow them to express themselves...you may come to the realization that they have a valid point as to why they deserve a new toy. I mean if the incoherent screams of runny-nosed, defiant little bastards don't make you realize that you are indeed equals in the parent/child relationship, what will?

What this whole concept really does is ensure that kids, when they grow up, are unable to function in society like normal adults because in the real world, there are always hierarchies in which very few people have a say in what goes on and everyone else needs to follow suit or file out the door.

Perhaps at my next work meeting when my boss tells me that I'm not due for a raise or that I need to go finish up some work I'll throw a tantrum about how unfair and inconsiderate he is being...that should lift me a couple rungs up the ladder and get me a new office with a view


  1. Arghh, parents are ridiculously lazy these days. My mom was an actual mom- with the scoldings and the bedtimes and the punishing and we have an amazing relationship.

    Btw, thanks for the comment on my post. That was really nice CT! :) Yeah, I am blaming the bubbles for the whole revealing. I figured most people know my alter ego anyway. If it's ok, I'm still blaming all of the bad things I do on Lola.

  2. Sure thing, Lola. Yeah, parents are no longer parents. They'd rather be BFF's...

  3. Thank goodness my parents aren't watered down versions of authoritative figures! My mom has become more lenient over the years, though, so my little (he's 10) brother gets away with a lot more than I think he should, and I don't hesitate to put him in his place (my mom is finally starting to pick up on that,too). Oh, and I thought the red ink thing was so stupid when I heard about it! I mean, all of my tests and papers were graded with red ink, and I'm not crying about it today. I don't run screaming when I see red ink! So when kids start "freaking out" about blues and greens, then what? Invisible ink? Awesome!

  4. Hahah...Right on. Invisible ink-that's great! I know what you mean about parents becoming more lenient with each child...that happens. Some people just take it waay too far.


Please sign in to make a comment.